Legs perched on handlebars, hands dangling by his sides; he steers by graceful childhood joy into the parking lot of Paul’s Market, as my truck moves past. Not for him any concern of past or future, no awareness of shuttered glances between parents and eloquent silences. These come later, in half remembered visions if he is lucky, or not at all if he is not.
For now, I wonder, does he have that unfocused pleasure in being young; a Tom Sawyer seeing Pirates and treasure among the general decline?
Who would spoil those few years by contributing to a flood of unwanted, un-blockable data: streams of image destroying commercials, internet porn, and mom’s new “Dad”? Is he able to construct a fort of fabrication, holding off barbarian hordes with dirt clods and sling shots. Or, are his friends already “cool”? Are there any gentle pleasures for him these last days of summer? Or, is his sister showing off her new tattoo?
I wish him a cone of oblivion to the present: A pig-wallow of false innocence to keep away the burning sunlight.
Out of sight from the rear view mirror, he has blended into the past. Already, he is too distant to benefit from the man he will become. No amount of rooftop shouting will reach his ear; all pleas to stand still and resist the flow of time are only whispers that sound like spokes rattling on his bicycle wheels.
There is Mr. Junior waving as I round the bend. Does he at 94 voicelessly shout to me, poised, as in the middle I am, to heed his advice and warnings of the road ahead?
The road winds on into the town of Sweetwater, avoiding the interstate, I travel Oakland Rd to downtown. Past the Farmer’s Co-op fertilizer storage, past the used car-lot, the old post-office, the three block downtown area revitalized with antiques shops selling a past we cannot have.
The closed textile mills, one with new life promising that we can “sell it for you on E-Bay”, a promise of deceit for a culture of conspicuous consumption that the crap bought today will bring riches tomorrow. And, I wonder do I hear a voice shouting from a rooftop?
I pass Richesin’s Feed and Seed: closed after 75 years by people who can’t be bothered to rearrange their shopping hours. The same people navigating by siren calls will close Archer’s Pharmacy in the next year as they ground in the breakwater at Walgreens.
And I hear the whispers as my wheels turn.
I leave town and pass a new home, two stories, incomplete, gradually falling in on its self. Outlasting as a ruin the relationship it now mirrors.
Pulling back onto our farm I survey all we have done in knowledge that all the work is as temporary as our tenure on this place. I hear Junior call from six miles away, “We are only stewards of the decline”.